The Champion Awards

When I was in college, my roommate and I had a term for when someone did something stupid. We called it, "Being a champion." Well, I have had some championship caliber moments while I have been overseas. These are just some of the lowlights.

The last weeks of February will go down some of the strangest weeks here so far. On the 28th of February our visa was going to expire so we had to have some passport photos taken. We went to the metro station where there is an instant photo booth that also takes passport pictures. I was very excited because the instructions were in English! I put in the coins and waited for my photo to be taken. The computer told me that my face was not fitting in the screen so I had to move forward. I moved forward and waited. Nothing happened. I looked down at the screen to see if I needed to press a button or something. As I did that, the photo was taken. So my first passport picture was of the top of my head. I tried again. I placed my face within the frame and then waited. Tonya counted down for me as she peered into the booth. The computer told me to move my head forward to fit into the frame again. I did and sat and waited. This time the picture took. The photo was zoomed so close to my face that it bordered on ridiculous. The deputy principal commented on the photo: "I thought this was supposed to be a picture of you." Classic.

The next day I was walking out of our flat and was carrying a large box. It was cold but appeared to be dry outside so I gave it no thought as I walked down the steps. The steps were covered in black ice so I slipped, sending the box high into the sky and me crashing down on the steps. The pain, oh the pain! I just laid there for a moment, hoping that I had not broken my rear end. I didn't, thank The Lord. But as I write this, I can't exactly sit properly. Amazing.

The next day was cold. So cold that I put on a light coat and a heavy coat. I was walking to the bus trying to zip up my coat. It was a struggle, which made no sense, because I learned to zip a coat many, many years ago. After getting off the bus, I stopped to assess what the problem was. To my humiliation, I had zipped the two separate coats together. Legendary. 

To begin the week, I received a certified letter from the post office that my beef jerky was being confiscated. That has received its own blog. The Champion Award goes to...me.